Many couples walk into my office arguing about their perspectives.
Each believing that he/she is "Right."
They are very defended with their way of understanding the situation, the relationship and the world.
Many a times holding on to their way as the only way and the correct way.
Of course, there are different theories of explanation for the interaction. May it be personality, upbringing, cultural reference, family values or expectations, this attitude will never be productive in a relationship.
To clarify the issue of perspective, I sometimes utilize optical illusions to make a point. (Be aware, some of these may cause dizziness for those who are more sensitive visually.)
Looks like it's moving and creating a wave movement...
But It's Not.
Compare the dots in the center of both groupings...which is bigger?
They are exactly the same size.
Focus on the center...the flower pattern is moving...Not!
We are often so convinced that we are right. We are correct in our perspective. The reality may speak differently. It's not a "either, or" but a "and, with" complimentary perspective that is more accurate.
May couples grow old together and still feel respected and connected.
If not, I guess you can always focus on the musicians.
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